Why do we get married? Because of love? If my life is all the same after marriage, isn't it pointless to get married? It doesn't make any difference, except for my status - married, instead of single.
Do guys want security? Hmm...a girl asked me to marry her, yet I couldn't find security in the future she's giving me. I might be in another part of the world for the next few years. And she might choose to be in another part of the world for the next few years. Her family is in another part of the world. And my family is in another part of the world. And she'll be working in yet another part of the world. I couldn't find the connection. I couldn't find the things that connects her to me. Simply love? I couldn't find the things that can be changed or improved through our marriage.
I am a muslim. To me, the love between 2 persons actually does not involves only that 2 persons. When we are married to someone, we are married to her family, her relatives, her friends, and even her pet. We are married to her whole life. I know, we can't please everybody. But do consider the important people in her life. Love is nothing without blessings.
I have a 60-year-old mother. And I'm the last son in the family. All 4 of my brothers were married. To be honest, not all went well. Therefore in things such as this, I tend to think about my mother. I seek her blessing more than everything else. You can't have me if you don't have her.
Do guys want security? Hmm...a girl asked me to marry her, yet I couldn't find security in the future she's giving me. I might be in another part of the world for the next few years. And she might choose to be in another part of the world for the next few years. Her family is in another part of the world. And my family is in another part of the world. And she'll be working in yet another part of the world. I couldn't find the connection. I couldn't find the things that connects her to me. Simply love? I couldn't find the things that can be changed or improved through our marriage.
I am a muslim. To me, the love between 2 persons actually does not involves only that 2 persons. When we are married to someone, we are married to her family, her relatives, her friends, and even her pet. We are married to her whole life. I know, we can't please everybody. But do consider the important people in her life. Love is nothing without blessings.
I have a 60-year-old mother. And I'm the last son in the family. All 4 of my brothers were married. To be honest, not all went well. Therefore in things such as this, I tend to think about my mother. I seek her blessing more than everything else. You can't have me if you don't have her.
35 comments:
hahahaha. I like this part:
"You can't have me if you don't have her."
I guess it applies to a lot of people including me. =)
kau tau apa itu competent cells? named it JM109, Top 10, T0P10f, BL21 etc etc etc
aku rasa semua orang kene jadi competent cells, biar kene treat CaCl, electroporation ke, hanahan ker, biar lalu mana mana proses tu semua untuk ready masa proses transformation. Ready masa cloning.
Baru boleh ekspress semua gene, baru boleh keluar protein.
competent cells vital dowh!
**RA**
Bila ko dh ckp camtu, aku rasa ayat itu juga sesuai diucapkan oleh seorang suami kpd seorang wanita yg mahu jadi madu kepada isterinya. Muahaha
**BTMD**
Ya, aku faham, kamu mmg bakal sasterawan negara...
yup,susah kan nak please everyone.
*pojan
aku xpaham pun apa maksud semua tu.nanti bila hang dah famous jgn lupa aku k
mak aii....
deep thinking on this issue nmpk
huhu~jgn pk sgt...just go wif the flow...hahaha~
BTMD~
ceh ko ke pojan?hampeh~~~
tell me bout all those cloning thingy la kan?
lyana ruzlan
keep it low,
cakap slow slow, ada musuh disebalik telur!
lol. gotta hand it to u bro.
this is the first time i've ever heard a guy mentioning 'security' instead of a girl.
should be the other way around i think. lol
i think most guys marry not because she is 'compatible' with his family or because she could provide security. rather, because there's chemistry between em.
girls on the other hand, do think about family compatibility more frequently than guys. perhaps, due to the fact that they're more of a follower than a leader in the family.
im thankful to God that my mom is quite liberal. she won't force me to marry anyone. even if she doesnt agree with me, she'd say..
"solat la istiharah, mintak petunjuk dgn Allah swt. kalau ok teruskan.."
yeah, dont blame my mom. most girls that i dig aint really wanita muslimah. i hv a thing for free spirited, cute babe with immaculate speech.
so maybe, u should ask ur mom to pray istiharah for ya? hehe
Lutfi..
Hai!
Bila nak berkahwin?
:)
**zali**
aik? kenape x comment sbg razaliinthe1821?
haha, jgn la kantoikan pojan~ penat dia rahsiakan identiti~
**LR**
go wit the flow? jgn main2, benda ni pergi x kembali woo, no turning back. Selengai-lengai aku, ada benda yg aku amik serius tau~ kalo x, dulu ko jd secretary takde keje. huhu
**BiTMD**
Err...telow?
**the unknown**
Hey, i like u ;) Well, I could have used another title, but 'security' caught ur attention, didn't it?
Btw, dun worry, I'm a straight guy. lol.
Perhaps, what u said is entirely correct. The only thing u missed out was, I am not most guys. Huhu.
What should or what should not is a subjective interpretation, depending on who that person is, and what situation he's in at that moment. Even if you're in the majority crowd, it doesn't mean that you're right, or in this case, normal.
But u said it urself, the guy is the leader. So as the leader, he should think of everything from every angle, and think ahead too. Chemistry is very important, but I'd rather not let myself be clouded by the smokes from all the chemical reaction. Huhu. I'm a leader, gotta have clear vision (^_^)
But one thing for sure, we got the same taste for girls. Gimme 5! (^_^)
P/s: istikharah kena buat sendiri daa~
**Haikal**
Aku nak berkahwin apabila aku dah ada niat nak kahwin :p
perhaps, aku mgkn x ready lagi kot benda2 alah ini...haha~
yela2....aku tau la ko x lengai...if x, xderla aku dok bz jer dulu~
the unknown-"most girls that i dig aint really wanita muslimah. i hv a thing for free spirited, cute babe with immaculate speech."
lut-"But one thing for sure, we got the same taste for girls. Gimme 5! (^_^)"
~lut,i figured that u like cute girls but one that not really a muslimah?hmmm ye ke??? =)
i think u misunderstood lut's statement.
logically speaking, the part where the gal aint a muslimah is not a necessary condition for the assertion to be true.
meaning, it's ok for the gal to be a muslimah and at the same time be free spirited, babelicious and good in speech.
the thing is, most muslimah usually differ from that aspect. they can be cute but not free spirited. they can be gorgeous but lack the eloquence. muslimah tend to be contrived in their speech.. and could devoid spontaneity.
korg ni kene jumpe n bincang
go and talked to her
have u ever wonder sumtyms she has no power over what she chooses
instead those are the only option was left for her
i'm sure she's working hard to make the path to meet
trust me..as much as a guy needs a girl
pompuan lagi la
pompuan lagi bnyk pk benda ni dari laki
laki can carve their own path
pompuan kene carve her path according to the needs of the one she loves
sekali sekala pk sejenak
apa-apa hal, kena pastikan niat kita kerana tuhan. Kahwin kerana Tuhan sbb nk dapat pahala menyelamatkan gadis tu sblm meninggal dunia. nk dpt pahala sbb dpt bw n didik dia dgn ajaranNya. U kna yakin dgn niat u n security yg u nk pasti akan dtg utk u dariNya kerana u ikhlas semata2 keranaNya. Gudluck
bila niat u confirm,u tekad akan buat apa shj demi fulfillkn niat u krn tuhan,pasti akan dtg kemudahan. Majoriti yg berkahwin akn hadapi pelbagai dugaan yg xterfikir. Kita xtau apa yg dirasai oleh abg2 u. mungkin mereka merasai apa yg u rasai ni sblm mereka nk berkahwin. mungkin saja. mungkin tidak. mungkin ni yg u fikirkan skrg, semasa, akan dtg, x terjangka. biasalah rasa ni bila u rasa ni. perempuan slalunya mudah bertolak ansur if u berbincang. maaf sy tertarik dgn security yg u katakan. even kita dh bergelar suami/isteri rasa insecure tu ada. hanya pdNya dpt melegakn hati kita. ibu u ibu bakal isteri u jg. pasti dia fhm. setiap dari kita kna fhm apa tanggungjwb kita sbg hambaNya,sbg anak, sbg abang/kakak, suami,isteri,dsb.pasti dipermudahkan urusan.sy tertarik lg sbb seorang gadis minta tolong u tolong kahwini dia. kasihani gadis itu jika u sudah berkemampuan. InsyaAllah, hal rumah,lokasi,duduk berbincang pasti ada jwpn. jika tidak, mohon pdNya. Cerita agso n madina tv9 tu sedikit sebanyak terbuka minda sy betul ke ada gadis spt madina? haha. tetapi niat mmg kerana tuhan. cantik.
aku dah makin blur.....
lutfi, ngkau seperti perlu dikahwinkan cepat2 aje.
the unknown
yep, maybe i did misunderstood what he meant =)
anon - i so very much agree with u.lut should talk about this with her.
and lut, aku tak penah bagi komen pjg2 kat org, apehal tah aku rjn sgt tulis pjg2 ni. but seriously dude, talk to her. help her. find solutions together.maybe you wont get the answers now but maybe, later things will work out the way u want it to be aite?
"Aku nak berkahwin apabila aku dah ada niat nak kahwin :p"
Owh, selamanya ni lufi takde niat nak berkahwin..
(sori mis x) =)
**lyana Ruzlan**
yana, ko dah tua. Cpt2 la ready~ muahaha. nnt adik ko langkah bendul kang :p
**VI**
There u go, the unknown already answered ur Q. huhu. Muslimah is only a figure of speech. Mmg la aku nak sesorg yang menjaga keislamannya. But I want a lively one (^_^) Kan ko dah tgk list 'the one i want'? Nanti aku post list tu kat blog ni. Perlu tak? huhu
And btw, entry ni dibuat sebaik shj slps kejadian. Aku dah ada diskus dgn dia, dun worry. Takdenye aku nak buat dia mati terkejut. Haha. I know, she's ur fren too ;)
**the unknown**
that's y i said i like u. Gimme another 5, brother!
*Anon**
I know. She has her needs and limitations. I'm not 100% opposing her decision. I'm not saying she can't do what she likes to do at all. But the limitation is this, don't let the marriage lose its meaning. Believe me, it's for her own good too (^_^) and dun worry, i did discuss this with her. Takde la nak reject dia terus. huhu :p
**bsc**
i assume u're an...akak?
thanks for the long comment :)
Niat mmg la konfem, kak. Tp mcm mana la nak fulfillkan kalau dh besar kemungkinan lps kawin mgkn 4-5 thn tak jmp. Then lepas2 tu jadi weekend husband pulak 10-20 thn. Patut ke saya selamatkan gadis lain plak? hehe :p
saya tak risau sgt pasal hal2 lain tu, kak. Sy risau kalau perkahwinan ni nanti tak membawa apa2 erti je. Masing2 buat hal sniri, dah sbb jarang sgt jmp. So, apa yang saya nampak kemungkinan besar akan berlaku di masa akan dtg, saya suarakan la skrg. Supaya masing2 boleh rearrange apa yg patut. Supaya nnt lepas kawin tu kurang la rasa insecurity tu. Kan? Kalau masing2 boleh compromise, insyaAllah akan kahwin juga. (^_^)
Ni x cerita pasal ex-girlfren lagi. Mau menangis akak kut. *sigh*
**zali**
aku pun blur kejap tetiba ramai komen2 yg x dikenali. Pjg2 plak tu. Seetot pun tetiba muncul. Scandalous sgt ke entry ni? Musykil aku. huhu
**seetot**
oh, kalau aku x dikahwinkan cepat, aku akan melakukan zina ek? :p
**haikal**
maknanya kalau selama ni aku dah ada niat nak kahwin, aku dah nak kahwin la ek...?
mak aiiii...gler hangat topic ko siut~hahahahaha~
rmi org concern dgn hidup ko rupernyer..no need for secretary lagi la...haha~(selamat aku)
halo....x ar tue sgt k!adek aku tkkn langkah bendul punyerla.....hihi~
**lyana Ruzlan**
Ceh, masa ko jd secretary dulu pun mcm la ko concern pasal idup aku pun~ huhu. Tp tu la, bagus betul diorang, sgt supportive. Thanks everybody (^_^)
Tp kan, aku x rasa diorg sggup jadi wedding planner aku...so ko x slmt gak~ hahahaha
Women - alamak, dah nak dekat masuk 30......
Men - I'll be 40 soon, yahoo~
See the difference? Ko dh tua... :p
betul tu lufi macamtu.. tgk contoh pojan. de niat nak kawen trus bertunang.
p/s: mujur pojan dah tutup blog. dia xtaula komen ni.. ;)
sungguh hangat..aku follow jer..apepun gudlak la luppi..aku doakan yg tabaik utk ko..yg pnting nk kawen nnt,jmputla aku..tu pon kalu aku available ms tuh..hehehe..
-ko pun da pk psl kawen.yesss!!tu la,jgn duk ngater org..tau pon pening..muahaaa-
sungguh hangat..aku follow jer..apepun gudlak la luppi..aku doakan yg tabaik utk ko..yg pnting nk kawen nnt,jmputla aku..tu pon kalu aku available ms tuh..hehehe..
-ko pun da pk psl kawen.yesss!!tu la,jgn duk ngater org..tau pon pening..muahaaa-
sungguh hangat..aku follow jer..apepun gudlak la luppi..aku doakan yg tabaik utk ko..yg pnting nk kawen nnt,jmputla aku..tu pon kalu aku available ms tuh..hehehe..
-ko pun da pk psl kawen.yesss!!tu la,jgn duk ngater org..tau pon pening..muahaaa-
theres no exact reason for u to love somebody or u marry somebody. theres no exact reason for both of my husband and i bersama.k adik. byk lg ilmu kita perlu pelajari. terlalu byk. k, akak termasuk blog adik mlalui tajuk earth hour. dpt info utk kajian kes. trima kasih.
"theres no exact reason for u to love somebody or u marry somebody. theres no exact reason for both of my husband and i bersama."
i think there is, whether u're aware of it or not, there is an exact reason for it.
being oblivious of the exact reason does not nullify its existence.
jodoh as we call it, does not work like the flipping of the tv channel or putting butter on bread. it's not as simple as that.
Allah swt has promised in the quran..
24:26
"dan wanita-wanita yang baik adalah untuk laki-laki yang baik dan laki-laki yang baik adalah untuk wanita-wanita yang baik (pula).."
and it is said in one of the hadith more or less..
"setiap yang lahir kebumi ini 4 perkara yang telah ditetapkan iaitu rezeki, jodoh, ajal maut dan tanah perkuburan."
jodoh marks a great change in one's life. marry a good person and the path of good could be opened to u. marry the opposite, and darkness prevails.
if jodoh is that crucial to the evolution of the ummah, do u think God gonna leave it to chance??
think before u speak and perhaps, wisdom would choose to be ur guest.
lut lut.there's a thing called compromise.and it has meaning too.y dun u try adding it to ur vocabulary la dude.hemph!life's not easy.if its easy,it wouldn't be called life.cherish the people around you.you'll never know when it's too late =)
seminggu dua ni x smpt nak online~ huhu
**haikal**
apesal bile pojan ada niat, x terus kawen je..? tunang dulu?
**Fazila**
mana ada penin. X penin pun~ saje tulis kat sini bagi pengajaran kat korang. huhu
**bsc & the unknown**
Thank you both. The both of you have been very kind (^_^)
In my opinion, there are reasons. But we cannot simply say that this or that is the real reason with 100% confidence. Allah holds the absolute reason. But we human can create as many reasons as we want, and they all could be as real as we want. Asal bahagia (^_^)
**Rahah**
Hah hah. Hey, ko tak tau betapa tinggi aku punya tahap kompromi~ tak tercapai akalmu. huhu. dun wory too much ek, aku cherish je org2 keliling aku. Ko nak buah ceri gak? huhu. Thanks 4 d tips ;)
dalam agama suruh!
kalau mampu n penuhi syarat
Memang la!
Tapi!
Kalau! Kalau! Kalau!~
Sekian (^_^)
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