Last night was very...blues.
Darn.
It's been quite a while since my last 'blues night'. U know, thinking deeply about life and relationship.
I'm not talking about the lovey-dovey thing here. However, it's close to that. But not exactly it.
I was studying for my environmental biotech quiz. Sambil dengar lagu jay chou and at the same time enjoying the soothing night. Then, out of a sudden, somebody crossed my mind. Ganggu je aku nak study....
It's a promise. A promise made about 5 years ago.
I've been holding to this promise ever since. Barely holding. Never ever had a chance to grab it tight. Tak tahulah salah di pihak siapa. Or maybe it's nobody's fault.
I never did take the promise as a play or something as to fill up my pasttime. In fact, I did take it seriously. Even though i'm not the one who requested this promise. I sincerely accepted and willing to commit to it.
I do meet that person once or twice a year. But as days go by, the promise seems to be fading as well. At least from my view, it is. I don't know what's on that person's mind.
The promise should make us closer to each other. Instead, We're getting more far apart.
I can't reach. That person didn't reach me too. I don't know whether the person tried or not.
When I remembered the promise, it makes my life miserable. Coz I don't think I'm fulfilling it. Nor did I try. I can't find the opportunity to even try. Was I given the opportunity? I didn't see any.
I don't want any more of this miserable promise.
Maybe the person doesn't even need it anymore. That's why things turn out to be like this.
I've been thinking hard, and deep.
I've decided.
Let go. I guess that's the best thing I should do. Let go of the promise.
It's only a matter of time till I see this person again.
The day we meet again, will be the day I break the promise. And let go.
9 comments:
aper promise tu???
Terlibat dlm perfileman 'The Promise' kot.
ye la tu, saya laa jang dong gun... huh...
no comment...i'm tired. hope i can refresh myself in langkawi. langkawi~langkawi~banyai~
Jang Dong Gun? Siapa tu? Comel tak? Klu ye, tak sesuai arr dgn awak. Mwahaha.
as time passed by people forgot almost everything.meet new people made new promise.
the broken promise.tragik jugalah.
**arshana**
jang dong gun tuh pelakon utama citer the promise laa. Anyway, main lumpur best wooo~~
**ann**
stuju dgn ann! maybe all of us are doing what ann sez. nak buat camane, kan?...nak tak nak, people change. so, it's nobody's fault
Lupi..
Promise is a promise, guys never break the promise off unless it is agreeable from both side. Unless the other side no longer need you only then can you break the promise. Or else, you can't dear.
Just hold on, and try to ask the other side if he/she still hold on to the promise that both of you made. If he/she agrees to let go, only then can you move on. Or else you're tied, dear, I'm sorry to say.
yepyep. so true. If I break this one, it would be the first time I break a promise, on purpose.
I really don't wanna break it, nor do I want to hold on to it if it's pointless.
Maybe I'll ask the person once more.
Thanks buddy.
That's a very thoughtful comment from irzan, and I couldn't agree more with both of you.
A girl needs a guy who stays.
I think in a relationship, the biggest barrier of it all is communication. How the relationship works, guys and girls perceive it differently.
And most of the time, we thought it doesn't work because of how we feel of each other. Instead, what made us far apart from each other is because we need different things, but the other party give different things and vice versa. As a result, we don't feel we're fulfilled out of the relationship.
It's nobody's fault - we just have got to learn from each other.
Well, as usual, what can you expect from Ati if she's not quoting from her book - but at the very least, so far it helps me put things into perspective.
And I'm very happy to say that right now, once what I thought was a problem - now is not anymore!
:)
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